When I think of mothers, I think of almost ritualistic, uncomplaining sacrifice for their families, often to their own detriment. Something we rarely discuss related to motherhood is the level of agency involved in that decision and how critical it is that people become parents when they’re ready for it. What some call an unsavory topic, I call a necessary component of comprehensive healthcare.
We’ve made it through another Lent, and on this Easter morning, many are celebrating the end of a period of fasting. I am less celebratory as I consider how to move forward from a digital detox that I (surprisingly) loved. I undertook this project because I wanted to make a change, and I have some ideas on how to build a healthier relationship with the digital world.
Not everyone is ready for a full-scale digital detox, especially when the social media apps we use are designed to addict us. For people who desire to create some distance from their devices, there are smaller-scale steps that can help to build stronger boundaries and healthier alternatives to what most of us do mindlessly. This week’s focus is on Catherine Price’s week-long phone-breakup challenge.
To recognize that your time and attention are valuable, non-renewable resources is to win a major battle in the David-and-Goliath fight we face every time we pick up our phones. Once we understand just how much money social media platforms make from what we give them for free, we will start to view each digital interaction as a war they don’t want to lose.
For someone who has always been burdened with an overabundance of hobbies and interests, I found this week’s action of cultivating “high-quality leisure activities” to be an interesting, if confusing one. For years I have fought for more down-time for myself, but I am coming to learn that passive time spent scrolling through social media is neither restful nor healthy.
Once we come to terms with the fact that we have a limited amount of time on this earth, the decisions we make become incredibly meaningful. I was likely an English major in a very close parallel universe, as the insights in this week’s digital detox update reference JRR Tolkien, Robert Frost, and others from my bookshelf to explore a seemingly simple directive: don’t click like.
Once you’ve removed the digital clutter, you need to make sure you’re filling your time with more wholesome, restorative, and healthy activities. One of those things is getting comfortable with mental quiet time, during which you’re not being bombarded with external ideas. Solitude doesn’t have to be a scary thing – it can just be time to decompress and process thoughts and emotions.
It’s only a few days into Lent, and I’ve already bent (or broken) some rules – but largely for good reasons. The key to an effective digital declutter – and reentry – is focusing on why you’re using a given tool and making sure it’s supporting that end, not using you. A trip back home this week turned my regular schedule sideways and necessitated a little flexibility.
I have given up Facebook before, but I’ve never done anything as extreme as a digital detox. I recognize that my relationship with technology (especially social media) is unhealthy, so in the coming weeks, I hope to make my technological interactions more mindful and assess what works for me and what doesn’t. Ultimately, these are tools for me to use, not the other way around.
They say that low expectations are the key to happiness – and there is some truth to that. While I didn’t have low expectations for Italy, I tried to keep them realistic. As is the case when traveling, we encountered inconveniences, setbacks, and even some scary moments during those two weeks, but keeping perspective and flexibility helped us laugh about them, if only in retrospect.